Abstract
The poems in Scene Kid explore my childhood and young adulthood—the lingering residues of my past—in an attempt clarify my present and illuminate my future. As a queer kid brought up in an Evangelical Christian household, I turned toward “scene” music (what others might call punk, emo, screamo, or metalcore) to break free from the traditional narratives of gender and sexuality that I knew were incongruent with my body, my identities, and my desires. Alongside queer theoretical concepts, many poems in this collection utilize the affective qualities of scene music and its cultural touchstones—the moshpit, most importantly—to embrace queer desire. But while Scene Kid begins in the pit, it does not stay there. These poems also often grapple with my history of body dysmorphia and disordered eating, my complex relationship with my parents, and the continued significance of Christian iconography in my life. Among other methods, I use ekphrasis, traditional and experimental form, and visual media to confront these themes. Ultimately, Scene Kid encounters a self—my self—in flux across time, and asks if it is possible to find stability in the future. While this question can only remain unanswered, in asking it, these poems discover community, solidarity, healing, and acceptance along the way.